Pakmottab is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, fussy faun.

Pakmottab created gold nine million years ago.

If you believe in Pakmottab, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Pakmottab, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Pakmottab's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Pakmottab's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at galaxies.

2. Never sing in holy places.

3. Pakmottab must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never eat lemons.

5. Never write about moons.