Gon is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, blissful clam.

Gon created life six million years ago.

If you believe in Gon, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Gon, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Gon's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Gon's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Do not kill mites.

3. Do not dye your hair orange.

4. Gon must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Gon on top of all buildings.