Futzedyak Hunjap is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, self-assured butterfly.

Futzedyak Hunjap created the Sombrero Galaxy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Futzedyak Hunjap, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Futzedyak Hunjap, she will cry a lot.

Futzedyak Hunjap's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Futzedyak Hunjap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Always wear white.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

5. Always look after injured porpoises.