Stigveengig is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, proud swan.

Stigveengig created the planet Mars three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stigveengig, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Stigveengig, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Stigveengig's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Stigveengig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick dolphins.

2. Never go into white rooms.

3. Do not shave your neck.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never paint your hands orange.