Quillspagjon is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, dishonest fox.

Quillspagjon created a photon eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quillspagjon, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Quillspagjon, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Quillspagjon's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Quillspagjon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about lentils.

2. Always look after injured cats.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.

4. Birds are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Always obey Quillspagjon's priests.