Flapbestmip is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, merciless beaver.

Flapbestmip created everything that exists six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flapbestmip, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Flapbestmip, it will be very sad.

Flapbestmip's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Flapbestmip's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. You must never eat garlic.

3. Flapbestmip loves snakes, so they must be honoured.

4. Always wear gray.

5. Never wear trousers.