Labgov is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, benevolent dingo.

Labgov created viruses two billion years ago.

If you believe in Labgov, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Labgov, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Labgov's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Labgov's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never go into fawn rooms.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

4. Always help shrews in need.

5. Labgov loves mites, so they must be honoured.