Dagpaknig is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, overgenerous dolphin.

Dagpaknig created water three million years ago.

If you believe in Dagpaknig, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Dagpaknig, he will not care.

Dagpaknig's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Dagpaknig's Holy Commandments

1. Dagpaknig loves horses, so they must be respected.

2. Always wear mauve.

3. Do not wear purple clothing.

4. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a building before entering it.

5. Do not dye your hair indigo.