Badmanbonk is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, pitiless wren.

Badmanbonk created a charm quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Badmanbonk, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Badmanbonk, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Badmanbonk's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Badmanbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about comets.

2. Put Badmanbonk first in all things.

3. Never talk about cell theory.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Always help sick ants.