Nadweegutlopfuntafparkced is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, unthinking gerbil.

Nadweegutlopfuntafparkced created vertebrates three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nadweegutlopfuntafparkced, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Nadweegutlopfuntafparkced, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Nadweegutlopfuntafparkced's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Nadweegutlopfuntafparkced's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if nine snails approach from the north.

2. Worship no other gods but Nadweegutlopfuntafparkced.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Do not dye your hair purple.

5. Always look after injured sharks.