Ligquartruttjopbellcum is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, deceitful butterfly.

Ligquartruttjopbellcum created tapeworms seven million years ago.

If you believe in Ligquartruttjopbellcum, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Ligquartruttjopbellcum, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Ligquartruttjopbellcum's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Ligquartruttjopbellcum's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never talk about fire.