Quafrawvid Sandvigrothadtinflam is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, unthoughtful rhinoceros.

Quafrawvid Sandvigrothadtinflam created the Cigar Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quafrawvid Sandvigrothadtinflam, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Quafrawvid Sandvigrothadtinflam, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Quafrawvid Sandvigrothadtinflam's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Quafrawvid Sandvigrothadtinflam's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always wear mauve.

4. Never hurt rats.

5. You must love Quafrawvid Sandvigrothadtinflam.