Narlmetvab is a god.

It takes the form of a small, dishonourable spider.

Narlmetvab created the Andromeda Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Narlmetvab, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Narlmetvab, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Narlmetvab's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Narlmetvab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Narlmetvab's name in vain.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Do not eat apples.

4. Never think about amino acids.

5. Never write about gravity.