Bessmegcemmotnarlmitstaftonk is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, irritating fairy.

Bessmegcemmotnarlmitstaftonk created a bottom quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Bessmegcemmotnarlmitstaftonk, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Bessmegcemmotnarlmitstaftonk, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Bessmegcemmotnarlmitstaftonk's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Bessmegcemmotnarlmitstaftonk's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if three goats approach from the east.

2. Never paint your back violet.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not listen to music.