Looppogminsaw is a god.

She takes the form of a small, happy fly.

Looppogminsaw created a bottom quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Looppogminsaw, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Looppogminsaw, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Looppogminsaw's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Looppogminsaw's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never go into turquoise rooms.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.