Narveenmat is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, staggering badger.

Narveenmat created time and space four years ago.

If you believe in Narveenmat, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Narveenmat, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Narveenmat's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Narveenmat's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat limes.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.