Vadjopnil is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, proud cow.

Vadjopnil created an atom three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vadjopnil, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Vadjopnil, she will not care.

Vadjopnil's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Vadjopnil's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about nebulae.

2. Never run in holy places.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Hide if seven dogs approach from the east.