Wigxensag is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, sapient swan.

Wigxensag created the Large Magellanic Cloud nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wigxensag, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Wigxensag, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Wigxensag's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Wigxensag's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat beans.

2. Always obey Wigxensag's priests.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Never talk about moons.