Targnilljon is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, weak bat.

Targnilljon created Europe seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Targnilljon, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Targnilljon, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Targnilljon's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Targnilljon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Always obey Targnilljon's priests.

3. Never talk about gravity.

4. Do not speak about cherries.

5. Do not cook food in pots.