Gabbemcuss Femzodjamwapjap Garwikxem is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, witty narwhal.

Gabbemcuss Femzodjamwapjap Garwikxem created the Black Eye Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gabbemcuss Femzodjamwapjap Garwikxem, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Gabbemcuss Femzodjamwapjap Garwikxem, it will laugh at you.

Gabbemcuss Femzodjamwapjap Garwikxem's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Gabbemcuss Femzodjamwapjap Garwikxem's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Gabbemcuss Femzodjamwapjap Garwikxem's priests.

2. Gabbemcuss Femzodjamwapjap Garwikxem loves capybaras, so they must be respected.

3. Always help sick tortoises.

4. Always treat mites with great respect.

5. Respect your elders.