Bigxucbam is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, effective fish.

Bigxucbam created a charm quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bigxucbam, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bigxucbam, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Bigxucbam's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Bigxucbam's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate doves.

2. Always help dolphins.

3. Never write about stars.

4. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

5. Never eat bark.