Kansagsabbemlatlinyakarf is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, boastful ant.

Kansagsabbemlatlinyakarf created dark energy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Kansagsabbemlatlinyakarf, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Kansagsabbemlatlinyakarf, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Kansagsabbemlatlinyakarf's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Kansagsabbemlatlinyakarf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat corn.

2. Always help whales in need.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.