Yartsawgar is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, self-confident owl.

Yartsawgar created the planet Mars three billion years ago.

If you believe in Yartsawgar, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Yartsawgar, it will denounce you as a heretic.

Yartsawgar's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Yartsawgar's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Yartsawgar.

3. Retreat if six horses approach from the south.

4. Never hurt sharks.

5. Always help ducks.