Lopkaplip is a god.
He takes the form of a slim, tiresome warg.
Lopkaplip created the Sombrero Galaxy six thousand years ago.
If you believe in Lopkaplip, he will give you a free planet.
If you do not believe in Lopkaplip, he will make you grow a tail.
Lopkaplip's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.
Lopkaplip's Holy Commandments1. Feed all hungry voles.
2. Never mention frogs.
3. Do not make images of living things.
4. Never talk about seals.
5. You must pray to Lopkaplip eight times a day.