Fligbanlim is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, calm walrus.

Fligbanlim created the planet Earth three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fligbanlim, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Fligbanlim, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Fligbanlim's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Fligbanlim's Holy Commandments

1. Erect seven aluminium sculptures of Fligbanlim on top of important buildings.

2. Hide if eight manatees approach from the north.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never skip in the presence of ants.