Bantargmin is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, competent badger.

Bantargmin created a strange quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bantargmin, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Bantargmin, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Bantargmin's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Bantargmin's Holy Commandments

1. Erect nine aluminium sculptures of Bantargmin on top of important buildings.

2. You must never eat nuts.

3. Always help snails in need.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never talk about great tits.