Parktiknig is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, staggering goat.

Parktiknig created silver eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Parktiknig, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Parktiknig, it will denounce you as a heretic.

Parktiknig's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Parktiknig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not laugh in public.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Pray towards the east.