Quamflanlat is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, omniscient wolf.

Quamflanlat created the Sombrero Galaxy four years ago.

If you believe in Quamflanlat, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Quamflanlat, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Quamflanlat's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Quamflanlat's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Quamflanlat.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.