Tettitagmut is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, all-knowing gorilla.

Tettitagmut created the Sunflower Galaxy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tettitagmut, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Tettitagmut, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Tettitagmut's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Tettitagmut's Holy Commandments

1. Tettitagmut must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not eat carrots.

3. Do not hurt foxes.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.