Ruttailquag is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, loving alligator.

Ruttailquag created viruses three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ruttailquag, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Ruttailquag, he will be mildly annoyed.

Ruttailquag's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Ruttailquag's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Never wear magenta stockings.

3. Never think about asteroids.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Do not hurt squirrels.
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