Parktofhigsogpom is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, omnipotent whale.

Parktofhigsogpom created Africa nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Parktofhigsogpom, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Parktofhigsogpom, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Parktofhigsogpom's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Parktofhigsogpom's Holy Commandments

1. Always help shrews in need.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Always help sick birds.

4. Never write about nebulae.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.