Flagortrag Jinmilkop is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, generous monkey.

Flagortrag Jinmilkop created Europe three million years ago.

If you believe in Flagortrag Jinmilkop, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Flagortrag Jinmilkop, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Flagortrag Jinmilkop's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Flagortrag Jinmilkop's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Flagortrag Jinmilkop.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Run away if nine geese approach from the west.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not listen to music.