Hapcankon is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, confident aardvark.

Hapcankon created the Virgo Supercluster three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hapcankon, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Hapcankon, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Hapcankon's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Hapcankon's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear mauve.

2. Do not kill manatees.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Always help sick moths.