Sawstaftig is a god.
He takes the form of a very heavy, narcissistic dolphin.
Sawstaftig created carbon two quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in Sawstaftig, he will be very happy.
If you do not believe in Sawstaftig, he will turn you into a tree.
Sawstaftig's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.
Sawstaftig's Holy Commandments1. Never think about gravity.
2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.
3. Look mercifully on unfortunate foxes.
4. Worship no other gods but Sawstaftig.
5. Erect a large silver sculpture of Sawstaftig on top of all buildings.