Lambog Dumrillmil is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, irritating donkey.

Lambog Dumrillmil created time and space nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Lambog Dumrillmil, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Lambog Dumrillmil, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Lambog Dumrillmil's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Lambog Dumrillmil's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Never wear scarves.

3. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

4. Never hurt bats.

5. Never think ill of sick doves.