Banyatjin is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, quiet cobra.

Banyatjin created vertebrates three million years ago.

If you believe in Banyatjin, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Banyatjin, she will turn you into a rat.

Banyatjin's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Banyatjin's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

4. Always look after injured rats.

5. Do not wear silicon on your body.