Gomyakwap is a god.
It takes the form of a very long, awesome porpoise.
Gomyakwap created Europe three trillion years ago.
If you believe in Gomyakwap, it will answer your prayers.
If you do not believe in Gomyakwap, it will turn you into a mouse.
Gomyakwap's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.
Gomyakwap's Holy Commandments1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.
2. Never skip near squirrels.
3. Always look after injured pigs.
4. Never feed peanuts to dogs while wearing purple ear rings.
5. Gomyakwap must be the most important thing in your life.