Nakquimlop is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, flying octopus.

Nakquimlop created the Small Magellanic Cloud five billion years ago.

If you believe in Nakquimlop, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Nakquimlop, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Nakquimlop's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Nakquimlop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. You must never eat spinach.

4. Always help voles.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.