Sattailstrag is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, charitable guinea pig.

Sattailstrag created bats five billion years ago.

If you believe in Sattailstrag, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Sattailstrag, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Sattailstrag's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Sattailstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from pink doves, for they are unholy.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Feed all hungry monkeys.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate bats.