Cissbonkgom is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, unjust duck.

Cissbonkgom created an atom six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cissbonkgom, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Cissbonkgom, she will think nothing of it.

Cissbonkgom's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Cissbonkgom's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Cissbonkgom seven times a day.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate cats.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Do not dye your hair white.

5. Never talk about rats.