Nartgofmon is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, resourceful spider.

Nartgofmon created everything that exists two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nartgofmon, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Nartgofmon, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Nartgofmon's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Nartgofmon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Never think ill of sick grasshopers.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Never mention tapirs.

5. Do not hurt sheep.