Hamweedon is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, ruthless dragonfly.

Hamweedon created Asia nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Hamweedon, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Hamweedon, he will curse you with boils.

Hamweedon's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Hamweedon's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

2. Do not sit in public.

3. Never think about planets.

4. Never hurt tapirs.

5. Never mention whales.