Xucabweg is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, kind frog.

Xucabweg created oxygen six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xucabweg, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Xucabweg, it will boil you in a big pot.

Xucabweg's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Xucabweg's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if five aardvarks approach from the east.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not take Xucabweg's name in vain.

4. Never hurt sheep.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.