Megpigrill is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, selfish lizard.

Megpigrill created dark energy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Megpigrill, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Megpigrill, she will turn you into a hamster.

Megpigrill's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Megpigrill's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about amino acids.

2. Do not take Megpigrill's name in vain.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Run away if eight dogs approach from the west.