Pitcadpod is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, flying gnu.

Pitcadpod created everything that exists four billion years ago.

If you believe in Pitcadpod, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Pitcadpod, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Pitcadpod's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Pitcadpod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never talk about cell theory.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.