Rulcarveen is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, omniscient swallow.

Rulcarveen created matter seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rulcarveen, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Rulcarveen, she will not invite you to parties.

Rulcarveen's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Rulcarveen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in violet rooms.

2. Eagles are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate gulls.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never pour water over plants.