Jarntamrot is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, unjust pig.

Jarntamrot created everything that exists two years ago.

If you believe in Jarntamrot, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Jarntamrot, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Jarntamrot's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Jarntamrot's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into turquoise rooms.

2. Jarntamrot must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never look in ponds.