Labdossnurt Basstampak is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, sage otter.

Labdossnurt Basstampak created matter two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Labdossnurt Basstampak, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Labdossnurt Basstampak, it will destroy your home galaxy.

Labdossnurt Basstampak's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Labdossnurt Basstampak's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never think ill of sick porpoises.

4. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Labdossnurt Basstampak on top of all buildings.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.