Tigbonkton is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, bad-tempered cow.

Tigbonkton created the planet Saturn nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tigbonkton, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Tigbonkton, she will turn you into a frog.

Tigbonkton's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Tigbonkton's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Tigbonkton's priests.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate ants.

3. Worship no other gods but Tigbonkton.

4. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

5. Always pray immersed in water.