Monwotdag Vonbigpop is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, prudent bat.

Monwotdag Vonbigpop created the universe nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Monwotdag Vonbigpop, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Monwotdag Vonbigpop, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Monwotdag Vonbigpop's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Monwotdag Vonbigpop's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Never go into gray rooms.

3. Never sit in holy places.

4. Never talk about doves.

5. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.